I submitted my seat deposit to USC Gould School of Law today at 11am. It was simple — just a couple of clicks. But this has certainly been a (long) rollercoaster of a journey, from taking the LSAT to applying to law schools to talking to a lot of people and finally deciding on a school!

1. Studying for the LSAT and Submitting My Applications

In the fall of 2019 I decided I was going to apply to law school, and began familiarizing myself with the LSAT. For law school, the LSAT and GPA (but mainly the LSAT) is the primary factor determining what school you get into, as it is considered the most accurate predictor of how you will fare in the rigors of law school. Therefore, law school hopefuls dish out hundreds, even thousands of dollars to prepare for this beast, and test prep companies profit as a result. If you improve your LSAT score by even a couple points, you could save thousands of dollars through higher merit scholarship awards, they claim in order to justify the high cost of their prep courses. The resources (including free ones) available to prepare for the LSAT have increased in quantity and quality over the years, but those who can afford to pay for prep classes or tutoring probably still have a leg up. The LSAT is a predictably difficult exam, and the way you approach it can make or break your score.

Studying for and taking the LSAT is a rollercoaster in and of itself. If I were to do the process all over again, there are several things I would’ve done differently, as I dive into in my LSAT post. I spent much of 2020 on the LSAT and law school applications. The COVID-19 pandemic had some silver linings, one of them being more time to study for the LSAT (though this probably was not a competitive advantage because a lot of people probably had more time to study). For about 7 months I dedicated 2-3 hours each morning to studying, and took the LSAT in July 2020. I didn’t quite get the score I wanted, so I studied more, thinking I just needed more time (and a different prep book). I took it again in October…and did worse. The day my score came out (it was a Friday), I was crushed — mentally, emotionally, and physically.

The disappointing score led to my first big decision — should I take the LSAT a third time, or just apply to schools now? Most schools only take your highest score, with the caveat that it doesn’t look good if you take it multiple times and get the same score. I had heard that with rolling admissions, there’s a slight advantage to applying earlier in the cycle, but it’s also clear that schools care more about your LSAT score than the date you applied (they have to report the LSAT median of their entering class to the Law School Admission Council, or LSAC). Thus, this decision was a matter of determining how likely I believed I could increase my score in 2 months. I was optimistic that I could, but the view of my law school advisers and parents was probably more realistic. So finally, after a lot of talking to people, and meditating by a lake (as my college law school advisor recommended — she was so kind as to call me on a Friday night, that same Friday I received my score, and talk me through my agony), I submitted my law school applications in November 2020.

This was the first part of my Plan A that didn’t go to plan. My plan was to focus solely on the LSAT, then devote all my attention to writing my personal statement. When I decided to retake the LSAT in October, I ended up doing both simultaneously, which wasn’t ideal, but I was able to make it work. Looking back, it’s funny how I was worried taking the October LSAT would be too late in the cycle, and ended up going as far as starting to study for a third LSAT in June 2021 (mainly for the waitlist; but I didn’t end up taking it a third time as I realized it was likely to be a futile effort).

2. Writing My Personal Statement

Writing my personal statement and diversity statement was much more difficult and much longer of a process than I recall it was for undergrad. I started brainstorming before the summer but didn’t finalize it until November, after multiple rounds of edits and rewrites. I agonized over how best to structure my essay, what to leave out and what to add. At some point I realized I had to learn to listen to myself — sometimes an essay just “feels” right — but also not to trust myself as the end-all-be-all. I would strongly recommend getting feedback from all sorts of people whose opinion you value–professors, friends, law school students and alumni, colleagues, mentors, career counselors, and family members–but take everyone’s advice with a grain of salt. I am grateful and indebted to the time my support network devoted to making my personal statement stronger and giving me honest feedback. The process was more brutal than I could’ve ever imagined going into it—writing an essay really involves (mental) blood, sweat, and tears—but it is worth it. The journey of introspection leaves you a better person with a deeper understanding of yourself.

The personal statement may not make or break a law application, but it’s still really important and you want it to be your best work. If you can’t articulate why you want to spend 3 years and thousands of dollars to study the law, then maybe it’s not what you want to be doing. But the answer may lie deep within your subconscious, and you may have to do a lot of reflecting and piecing together all your life experiences to bring that out to the surface. It’s not easy!

3. The Waiting Period

Because I had applied early decision to college, I didn’t go through the process of applying to several schools. So in applying to grad school, I wanted to make sure I gave myself plenty of time to think through my decision, and applied to 15 schools. After that, it was just a matter of waiting, which was a time of immense uncertainty. The uncertainty in the world around me, from the presidential election to a racial justice reckoning to of course the COVID-19 pandemic, mirrored the uncertainty in my own world. Given my numbers, which were at or below the medians of all the T14 schools, it was very uncertain whether I would be accepted to one of the T14s, which was my Plan A (I had no Plan B). I went into the application process with a “T14 or bust” mindset — if I didn’t get into a T14, I was willing to wait and apply again next year.

Like many others around the world, I entered 2021 with a lot of optimism, both about the state of the world and about my law school apps. The emergence of multiple vaccines gave me hope that we would be able to do law school in-person next fall. I had also been accepted to two of my safety schools before Christmas, and was hopeful that there would be more good news to come in the new year. And even if law school didn’t work out, I knew I would have the option to reapply next year and either continue working at my current job or find a new job. The possibilities were endless, which made the uncertainty all the more scary, but also all the more hopeful.

I already have an addiction problem with checking my email all the time, but during the following weeks, my heart did a somersault every time I got an email that had some law school in the subject line. In the following weeks, I would receive letters of rejection, acceptance, and notification of being on the waitlist. And in the meantime, I sent letters of continued interest (LOCIs) to the schools I was waitlisted at and hadn’t heard back from, though I’m not sure those made any impact.

Note: this was an unprecedented law school cycle, probably the most competitive one EVER in recent law school history. Applications were up 35-45%, and the number of people who scored in the 160-180 range doubled from last year. The “Trump bump” and racial reckoning events probably drove more people to apply, and the pandemic and LSAT Flex probably had a lot to do with it too. With people stuck at home, nothing to do but study! And the LSAT Flex was only 3 sections instead of the usual 5 — I took it comfortably from my room. Since the LSAT score curve was based on how people performed in the old 5-section, in-person conditions, people generally did better. Because of all the uncertainty of this unprecedented year, law schools could afford to be more selective and less generous in scholarship awards. Needless to say, it has been an incredibly frustrating and drawn out process.

4. Making a Decision – Am I Happy with Plan B?

I was in no hurry to make a decision, but knew I would have to soon, potentially before having heard back from all the schools. Mainly, I needed to decide whether I wanted to go to law school this fall vs. reapply again next year. I went back and forth on this one. I talked to people who recommended reapplying, people who went to non-T14s and were happy but admitted that a T14 does broaden your opportunities and job prospects, and people who said the school you went to (and even your grades) don’t matter. (I write about the T14 or bust debate here!) And if I did reapply, would I be able to increase my LSAT score in the next few months?

Despite talking to several people, from current students and alums at the schools I was considering to lawyers well out of law school, I wasn’t any closer to making a decision. Looking back, I don’t see this as a big deal anymore, but at the time, I was really torn over whether to go to a non-T14, because I went into the application process with the goal of going to a T14, even though a T-20 can still set you up for success. For weeks I would have daily conversations with my parents that would go something like this:

Me: My goal was to go to a T14!

Parent: But you got into such great schools. Being at the top of USC is much better than being at the bottom of a T14.

Me: Who knows whether I’ll be at the top of USC? I may very well graduate at the bottom of the class, which will be worse than graduating at the bottom of a T14! 50 percent of the people who go to law school graduate in the bottom half of their class! And besides, T14 schools help you get jobs outside your region, it opens up your world of opportunities. Employers view you differently!

Parent: Why do you have to go to the best law school? These are all great schools; the school you go to doesn’t determine how great of a lawyer you’re going to be. Just look at me and your mom — we went to the best university in China, and look where we are now!

Me: Yes, law school doesn’t guarantee how good of a lawyer you’re going to be, but it gives you the resources and network and opportunities that can jumpstart your career.

Mom: What’s wrong with USC? They have the ranking, the scholarship, and wouldn’t it be nice to come back to California?

Dad: These are great schools; you should be happy with it. We’re proud of you.

The whole thing came down to one question that only I myself could answer: I went into the application process with a Plan A, and Plan A didn’t work. Am I content with a Plan B? No matter how many trusted people I talked to, no one could make my decision for me, because at the end of the day, I’m the one who is going to law school and living with the results of my decision.

My dad pointed out that if you always reach your goals, they’re not good goals. While that didn’t make me feel any better about not reaching this goal, it helped me put this short-term goal in perspective with my long-term goal of being a lawyer. Talking to lawyers who graduated from non-T14s doing interesting and inspiring work also helped put my decision in perspective. As my constitutional law professor elegantly stated, ultimately it’s not about making the right decision, but rather, making the decision right for you. 

I also think it’s okay not to be the most excited about law school in the same way you’d be excited about traveling to Paris or going to Disneyland or something. Law school is going to be tough! Tears will be shed, moments of doubt will be inevitable. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t the right choice for me.

Once I had decided I was going to forgo retaking the LSAT a third time and reapplying, I just had to pick a school, which was a whole other decision to make. Each school had its pros and cons and things I found attractive. I tried the color coding table method where you list the factors that matter to you and rank each school and total the numbers, and got basically the same score for all three. There were so many factors to think about and nuances within those factors, but in the end I chose USC for three simple reasons — ranking, finances, and community. USC was well known for its strong alumni network and friendly community, and that came through in the virtual events I attended and the people I spoke to. I think I would be most happy there, and graduating with the least amount of debt possible certainly helps.

Location was another big factor to consider, as a majority of USC grads stay in California and end up in big law. The people I spoke with emphasized over and over the importance of location. Law school is an antiquated institution, and employers like doing things the old-fashioned way. While some tech companies may be considering permanent remote work after the pandemic is over, law schools are eager to go back to the in-person way of doing things. A college classmate told me that law firms need to be convinced that you have ties to the city that you’re applying to work in. They need assurance that you’ll stay at your job for at least 3 years, because it takes about that long for you to be profitable for the firm. You also have to think about the bar exam. Most states are on the universal bar exam (UBE) and D.C. allows you to waive in without having taken the D.C. bar. However, a few lone states like California have their own exam, so if you take the bar exam in California but then find a job in Oregon, you’ll have to take the Oregon bar too. As someone who enjoys living in different places, this did not excite me so much. But law school gives you the opportunity to intern in different locations, and where you go to law school does not have to be where you end up practicing!

Knowing that I can be indecisive, my friend was proud of me, just for having made a decision. I informed my college career counselor, the one who talked through my decisions with me multiple times and provided really helpful advice, and this is what she wrote back:

Congratulations on the outcome and perhaps even more importantly, on a thoughtfully considered process. I know you felt frustrated that you were not getting the outcomes you hoped for throughout the application journey. I wish to share one aspect of my definition of success, which is to “have as few regrets as possible.” I hope you can look back and feel that way. It seems to me that you have been very thoughtful and intentional through the whole process. You worked hard to do your best at each turn, self reflect and think through outcomes. From where I sit, it seems that it has been a success. You are into a great school in an environment you want to be in – how awesome!

I wasn’t successful in the way I had defined success a year ago, but over the course of the past year, my idea of success changed. Already I am getting the sense that in a few years none of this will matter — all the frustration and setback I experienced attempting to climb an unprecedentedly narrow ladder into the top schools in the nation. I gave it my all. I took my time in making the best decision I could given the circumstances and my options. I am happy with my decision. And this is just the beginning.

5. Finally Time to Relax?

The main piece of advice I’ve heard is to enjoy the free time while I still have it (because it will be very limited in law school). So now I can (maybe) finally relax, read books that have been on my reading list for a while, spend time with friends and family, and maybe apply for a couple scholarships.

This was a lot, so if you made it this far, I really appreciate you coming along for the ride 🙂 I hope this was somewhat helpful and puts the law school application process in perspective. If you’re thinking about going to law school, make sure you know that you want to go (and not because your parents or professors or friends told you to) before even thinking about buying an LSAT prep book. Talk to people who pursued other graduate programs (something I wish I had done more of — there’s a lot of different degrees out there!). Ask both practicing and non-practicing lawyers if they felt their degree was worth the investment. Intern at a law firm. And when you are ready, don’t study for the LSAT like I did (at least initially). Embrace the grueling but rewarding application process — you’ll be glad you did!